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I don't even know how to give this post a title.  So, I will do what always gives me peace, and that is to talk to you straight from my heart.  My precious Mom is not in pain, but she is withering away right before my eyes.  The days pass quickly even though I don't want them to, but that is for my sake and not hers.  The last thing I want is for her to suffer or be in pain.  Mom is such a trooper and isn't going down without a fight! She is staying very comfortable on a very small dose of morphine off and on during the day, although she says she hates to sleep the day away.  Doesn't that sound just like her?!  It would be wonderful if she had the energy to do the things she wants to do around the house, but she just doesn't.  She has succumbed to that and has learned to ask for what she needs. She still won't trust the caretakers or me to make her morning malto-meal just like she wants, so she gets out of her recliner and does it herself!  And, of course, I think that's great!  

Mom is a realist and talks freely to us and wants us to do the same.  She is making her wishes known to us and we are doing everything in our power to see that they are met.  I admire her faith in God and know without a doubt in my heart that the angels of God will take her directly to Heaven.  That gives me so much comfort.  We are told in John 14:2, "In my Father's house are many rooms.  If it were  not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you?"  Mom's room will be full of beautiful flowering plants for her to tend and full of her loved ones whom have gone before her.  What a lovely homecoming that will be for her!


Now for the earthly realities...the Hospice nurse comes to the house now to offer comfort care including draining the fluid that is gathering around Mom's lung. She will continue to do the draining until I feel comfortable doing it.  The fluid causes Mom pain and makes it difficult for her to breathe.  It is not a pleasant procedure, but she does feel better after it is done.   She is having to be drained much more often now, and she will probably get to the point that we have to drain the fluid every day.  That's when it will be necessary for me to do it because Hospice doesn't have the manpower to send someone every day.  That's okay, it will be an honor to do anything I can do for her.  


We all feel that way.  It is such a blessing to have siblings whom work so well together as a team.  When one of us can't be there, the other steps up and goes.  It seems so crazy that life just goes on.  It feels like the world should stop and let us have time to manage this and only this.  But, that is not reality.  I know the Bible tells us that God won't give us more that we can handle, but we all feel a bit overwhelmed from time to time.  That's when our faith in God takes over and gives us strength  "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous hand."  Isaiah 41:10

Through this blog I have learned to gain strength through verses in the Bible, especially Psalms.  I didn't learn verses or study the Bible in my youth, but I did learn to find strength and guidance when I began writing this blog about Dad, starting when he had his stroke.  I could spend all day at my computer reading appropriate Bible passages and then writing them in the blog. They are such a comfort to me.  Like this from Joshua 1:9... "Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."  I am not frightened when I keep in mind that this is all in God's hands.  I trust in Him and know that He will help Mom, Dad and all of us handle this.


We are all also very concerned about Dad.  He is so sad and spends special time holding Mom's hand and "telling" her he loves her. He also spends a lot of time in front of his computer looking at pictures.  He can't verbalize his fears or his wishes, but we reassure him that we are and will always be there for him.  I can tell you that he is absolutely broken-hearted.   I plan to sit with him tonight and read to him the scriptures I have been studying today.  I pray that will give him some peace.

One of our greatest blessings is our close-knit family and network of friends.  That support is invaluable and so very much appreciated.  I know each of you has Mom and Dad in your prayers and Jean, Glenda, Danny and I, our spouses and all of our family thank you with all of our hearts. 

Our Father, Almighty God in Heaven, please be with my Mom, Mildred, and my Dad, Harvey, and give them peace and strength in this sad time.  Please be merciful on my Mom as she has been such a faithful servant to You.  I know that she belongs to You and praise You for having blessed us with having her in our lives.  When it is time for the angels to take her to join You in Heaven, give us the kind of strength and courage and power she had so that we may continue her works of faith and love. Please be with my Dad and comfort his loss.  Thank you, precious Lord.  I know You are hearing all the prayers pouring out for her, and that gives me peace.
Amen.

Prayers for Mildred, please!

Well, this is not exactly how we expected things to go, but, through the will of God, Mom and Dad were barely in their home and we had to put Mom in the hospital today.  She has been having more difficulty with her breathing, especially if she gets anxious or if she exerts herself at all.  This morning I arrived at their house at 10:00 as Mom and I had pre-arranged (I was hoping she would sleep late).  She had taken a shower and was dressed and sitting on the end of her bed, barely able to catch her breath.  I told her that it was time for her to go to the hospital and that I was calling an ambulance.  She didn't argue with me at that point.  However, two minutes later she decided that she was feeling better and that she really didn't want the ambulance to come.  I suggested that she allow them to come at least to check her blood oxygen level and give us their professional opinion as to whether or not she should be in the hospital, knowing full well the answer to that question!  Sure enough, they said she should let them take her in, so we went to Seton Central.  A chest x-ray showed that there was about 2 liters of fluid around her right lung, which was why she was so short of breath.  I think I told you previously that the fluid was IN her lung.  It is not...it is in the pleural cavity around the outside of her lung.  They immediately drew a lot of blood samples for testing and then had a radiologist insert a catheter and drew out 1.5 liters of fluid!  After about an hour of discomfort, Mom started feeling much better and she was breathing more easily.  At this point, around 3:00, they admitted her into Room 407.  This evening a CT scan of Mom's chest, abdomen and pelvic area was done.  The doctors are trying to determine what is causing the inflammatory fluid that the lung is producing.  One possibility is that there could be an infection somewhere in her belly and the lung would react like this. We will know much more after the test results come back.

We have arranged round-the-clock care for Dad through the company that has been providing the night-time assistance. In addition, Ollie was there with Dad most of the day today, Danny and Lisa are going tomorrow and Jean is going Monday.  Glenda and I are alternating being with Mom at the hospital.    Mom has requested prayers in lieu of visitors.  If you have any questions, call my cell phone 512/934-3641.  I will do my best to keep the blog updated.

Dear Lord
Please hear my prayers for my precious Mother, Mildred Smith.  Please heal whatever is causing this fluid around her lung and raise her from her sick bed. Release her from these chains of sickness and suffering. Make her whole again and give her back the strength of her body that she will continue to serve You.
Touch her body, just that single touch that brought sight to the blind, made the lame walk and the lepers run. That is all we ask of you tonight. Let this sickness not reoccur. Let her not suffer any longer with this fluid gathering around her lung. For, in faith, I know that nothing in this world is too difficult for You.
Be with her husband and my Dad, Harvey, whom is so worried about his loving wife of 66 years.  Please allow them to be able to be together and not to suffer or be in pain in their last years together.
Let no impurity of mine hinder this prayer from reaching you, but look past me and to the one who needs Your help. Father God.  I thank You for hearing my prayer.
In Jesus Christ's mighty name I pray. Amen

They're in!!

It's been a long week of getting things ready for the move, the actual move yesterday and unpacking boxes today, but Mom and Dad are about 80% settled in their new home!  They even spent their first night there last night and rested well!  Praise God!!!  They are both very pleased with the way their furniture fit and with the layout of the house.  OF course, it will take a while for it to feel like home, but they are happy and that's all that matters.

Mom has another doctor's appointment Monday, this time with the pulmonary specialist that came very highly recommended.  He is in the Seton network, so he already has had access to Mom's medical tests and reports, so he is ready to see her Monday.  Glenda sat with Mom today and filled out the lengthy medical history, so we are all set for the appointment. I will take her and will report back to you as soon as I know anything.  She isn't feeling well at all and spent most of today sitting on the couch, watching Jean, Glenda and I unpack boxes.  I am determined to get her back to her sweet self!  Prayers for her are greatly appreciated!

They already had visitors today!  Their next-door-neighbor came over to introduce herself and brought a plate of delicious cookies!  Becky works out of her home and told Mom and Dad to call her if there was anything she could help them with!  Later, my precious friend Kim Wagner came by with a house-warming gift and cake!  She cought them a birdhouse and a huge bag of bird seed!  Dad wanted me to hang it on the front porch immediately, but I explained that I didn't have the necessary hook and would hang it tomorrow.  He wanted it done today, but tomorrow will just have to do!!!

I plan on taking Mom to their new Church on Sunday, if she feels up to going.  Saint Vincent De Paul Church is about 12 minutes away.  I want to ride with her the first few times and make sure she finds it without any hitches!  It's so easy to get turned around when you're not used to driving in Austin.  A lot of the areas were not here when she and Dad lived here!

Gotta run but wanted to catch you up to date!  I'll talk to you after Monday's appointment!  Love, Sandi

Good news...bad news...

Well, after three weeks of doctor's visits, blood sets and CT scans, the good news is that Mom does not have lung cancer, pneumonia, congestive heart failure or rheumatoid arthritis. The bad news is that they still cannot tell us where the fluid on her right lung is coming from. The pulmonary specialist in Burnet is supposed tomcall me Monday with her thoughts, and her nurse said she would probably want tonschedule wn office visit for Mom next week. We feel like we need to examine other options. Our next step is to take Mom the best pulmonary specialist we can find and get another opinion. Glenda has great contacts and has found one in Austin, although we, including Mom, were willing to go wherever need be. I am thrilled that the specialust that came HIGHLY recommended is in Austin! We are all keeping very close tabs on Mom! And now for some very positive news!! Drum roll please!! Mom and Dad are scheduled to close on their garden home in North Austin on Tuesday, July 10!! Movers are scheduled to be at their hide on Thursday, July 12, and we expect them to spend the night there that night! Now that their initial anxieties are past, both Mom and Dad are looking forward to moving to Austin and being closer to their kids! I am especially thrilled because they are 2.4 miles from Ollie and me! Mom loves Luby's Cafeteria and there is one about 5 minutes from them, along with a plethora of other restaurants, stores, activities, etc.! Their new address is 9707 Anderson Mill Rd, #31, Austin TX 78750, and their new phone number is (512)250-9132. TheirnInternet will be turned on Friday and I will I Let you know their email address shortly. Mom will have a lot more time on her hands, so I plan to teach her how to email friends and family members! I think she will get a kick out of that! Oh...coincidentally, the company that provides Dad's caretakers, Homecare Assistance, is in a business complex at the entrance to Mom and Dad's complex! In fact, their address is the same, just a different suite number! Their director is so excited that he can keep a closer eye on their care! Such a God-thing! Glenda is spending the afternoon with Mom and Dad. She always arrives with multitudes of healthy food treats from Whole Foods Market, of course! She also rolls Mom's hair for her and gives Momand Dad great massages! They love that! I will be back in touch soon! Love to all!